Thanks for inviting me over for game night! I’ve actually never been to one of these before. My husband says I’m too competitive, but that’s just silly. Here, I brought potato salad.
So we’ll start out with a simple game of “Go Fish?” That sounds great. What a lovely deck of custom cards you have. And look: They come in their own case, with your company’s logo on it. You got them from Pinnacle Promotions, the leader in customized products? That’s fantastic. What a great way to market your company and spread the word about your brand. I’ve heard they offer everything from custom playing cards to custom chess sets, with custom games for all ages and all audiences. Your brand is certainly the life of this party, what with those custom printed scratch-offs and custom dice.
OK. So here with go. Let’s play “Go Fish.” I’ll go first. Got any fours? Yes? OK! This is exciting! Now you want to know if I have any sixes? I do not! Ha, ha, ha! Go f—, I mean go fish! Whoops! I’ll get the hang of this someday.
You want to switch to another game? I like the looks of that FIKI Football Game set. I was the quarterback on my powderpuff team in high school, so … or how about that custom Leed’s Air Hockey Desktop game? Gosh, it sure would be fun to shove that custom puck right down your throat! No, no, no, I’m just kidding! You don’t need to back away from me.
You’d rather we try a quiet game of chess, over by the fireplace? Oh, that sounds nice. What a lovely customized chess set. Let me read the marketing copy about it: “Introduce relaxation with this versatile 7-in-1 game set. Place it wherever people congregate: break rooms, dining halls, waiting rooms, lobbies, student unions, or conference rooms. The set includes game boards (on both sides of the lid) and game pieces for checkers, chess and backgammon, 28 dominoes, cribbage board and pegs, a standard deck of cards, four dice, and an instruction booklet. All components store neatly in wooden case. Includes 1-piece gift box.”
Well, isn’t that nice? Yes, let’s play a quiet game of chess. My move. Your move. My move. Your move. Oh, wow, you took my pawn. Huh. OK. Let’s see. HOW ABOUT THIS FOR A MOVE? I TAKE YOUR ROOK! HAHAHAHA! AND I THROW IT INTO THE FIREPLACE!
A-hem. Oh dear. I seem to have lost my cool a little bit there. Are you dialing 9-1-1? OK, I’ll just go. But I’m taking my potato salad, and that promotional Silly Putty, with me.